Wandering Through the Box Scores

Standings updates, league leaders and everything else you can learn at a glance.

I mentioned a couple of weeks ago the delightful boxscore email that comes to my inbox every morning, and it really does take me back to my younger days, when waking up meant going to the driveway to get the newspaper, wandering back into the kitchen, casually pulling out the sports page, pouring myself a bowl of cereal (with the box always right next to me because one bowl was never enough) and just meandering through the box scores until it was time to take the girls to school.

We’re in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, because last night we moved our youngest daughter into her senior year apartment.

I rarely eat cereal anymore.

There’s no newspaper anywhere to be found nearby.

I really don’t like how this age thing is going.

But at least there are old-fashioned box scores, even if they are on my computer.

Let’s see how baseball is going today.

Looks like nobody in the American League East is playing well — the Rays have lost three in a row, the Yankees two, the Blue Jays four. But look who is playing very well: The Chicago White Sox! They have the best run differential in the American League Central. In fact, the only American League teams with a better run differential than the Pale Hose are the Yankees and Mariners.

Don’t you love it when people call the White Sox the “Pale Hose?”

I’ve long thought that people should call the Red Sox the “Blush Hose.”

Looking at the American League Leaders — Yordan Alvarez is on Triple Crown pace! This used to be one of my favorite things to look for in the box scores; the whole idea of someone leading the league in batting average, home runs AND RBI was mind-boggling. From my earliest baseball memory, I knew that Yaz had won the Triple Crown the year I was born, and nobody won another for the first 45 years of my life.

Alvarez leads the league with a .316 average, he leads the league with 21 home runs, and he’s second in the league with 44 RBI, one behind his teammate Christian Walker. The Astros having the top two RBI guys in the league would have been something that excited me a lot more years ago, back when I thought RBI were more important than they are. Still, it’s kind of cool, no?

The Yankees Cam Schlittler leads the league with a 1.89 ERA — and I’m reminded of how dismissive Mike Schur was of Cam’s electric performance against the Red Sox in last year’s playoffs. Schlittler, you might remember, threw eight shutout innings and struck out 12 without walking anybody, and that seemed pretty darned good for a 24-year-old rookie, but Mike was convinced (being the fan that he is) that the story was much more about how bad the Red Sox offense was than how good Schlittler was.

We fans are a funny lot, right?

Someone should write a book about that. Oh, wait …

Anyway, the Red Sox offense WAS bad, but Schlittler is also crazy good — sometimes the answer is “both” — and being a Yankees grump, it makes me crazy that this team will have prospect after prospect flame out, but then they will just find some Boston kid at Northeastern, take him in the seventh round on a lark, watch him plotz around in the minors for a couple of years and then suddenly see him develop the most unhittable fastball in the world.

Cleveland’s Gavin Williams leads the league in wins (9) and strikeouts (94), and yes, somehow, Cleveland has done it again. The way this team develops pitchers is just bananas.

Over in the National League, the Braves are crazy good again, which shouldn’t be surprising. The surprising part was how they fell off the last couple of years. Here’s how good the Braves are: When you look at their team, you don’t see a single guy — or at least I don’t — who makes you think: “Wow, he is playing way over his head.”

But you see a BUNCH of guys — like Austin Riley and, until recently, Ronald Acuña Jr., and maybe Spencer Strider — who make you think: “Wow, wait ‘til he gets going.”

The Dodgers have a plus-134 run differential. Because, yeah.

Philadelphia’s Brandon Marsh is leading the National League in batting average at .335, to which I say: “Wut.”

Ashby is leading the National League with nine wins. When I saw that name, my first thought, because I’m old, is “Wait, Andy Ashby is still pitching?” Obviously, he is not — news alert to old brain: Alan Ashby is not playing anymore either — and Aaron Ashby is Andy’s nephew. Aaron is also a left-handed relief pitcher with a 9-0 record, and wouldn’t it be funny if the first 20-game winner since 2023 was a left-handed relief pitcher who threw something like 70 innings?

Well, funny is one word for it.

Kyle Schwarber has 23 home runs! One of my favorite things to do when I was young was try to calculate the home run pace of early leaders. So let’s see, Schwarbs had 23 home runs in 63 games. That means he’s on pace to hit 59 home runs over 162 games!

Yes, I realize now that Schwarbs won’t play 162 games — he can’t, he’s already missed five games — but my younger self didn’t worry too much about the math.

OK, finally: THE BOX SCORES!

Marlins 4, Nationals 1 — First thing I do is go look for James Wood; he’s become a favorite. Ugh, he went 0-for-3 with three strikeouts. Did anybody homer? Yes, Miami’s centerfielder Ruiz homered. Wait: Who? I thought all Ruizes were catchers — Carlos, Keibert, … oh, it’s Esteury Ruiz. I hadn’t thought about him for a while.

Tigers 7, Rays 2 — How did my guy Chandler Simpson do? Ugh, 0-for-4 with a strikeout. Chandler, buddy, you aren’t allowed to EVER strike out. Your whole bunt and bloop and run thing doesn’t work if you strike out. Looks like Dillon Dingler had a good day — two for four with a homer and four RBI. Dillon Dingler is a Grade A baseball name.

White Sox 8, Twins 0 — Look at them Pale Hose go. How did my favorite Colson Montgomery do … NOOOOOOO … 0-for-6 with four strikeouts? What? Yikes. So how did the White Sox score all those runs? Oh, I see, Andrew Benintendi had a day — two for three with a homer and three walks.

Mets 7, Mariners 1 — Are the Mets playing a LITTLE better? I guess they’re not. Bo Bichette had a nice game — 4-for-4 with three RBI. The three Mets relief pitchers were Raley, Weaver and Gerber, which sounds less like a law firm and more like a company trying to make a healthier baby food.

Phillies 3, Padres 2 — So I was watching this last night because of Cris Sánchez’s long scoreless inning streak — it ended at 50⅔ innings, which is the longest such streak for a lefty ever and the fifth longest overall. Schwarbs homered — I always get such a thrill when I see that 3 1 1 1 line — so that’s fun too. Also, Walker Buehler started for the Padres and it looks like he pitched pretty well. I’m always rooting for Walker Buehler.

Red Sox 8, Orioles 1 — Every single player in the Red Sox lineup got a hit. There’s a beautiful look to a box score when every player gets a hit. The Red Sox almost had the box score mathematical double because all but two players scored a run. If I were a Red Sox fan, and this were the old newspaper days, I would have clipped out this box score and put it in a scrapbook.

Guardians 5, Yankees 4 — It’s always a happy day when Cleveland beats New York in anything. When I see Cleveland win, especially when they score more than a couple of runs, I immediately think: “José Ramírez must have had a good day.” Well, of course he did: three hits and a home run for José. The Yankees were without Aaron Judge again, and that lineup doesn’t really strike fear into the heart when Aaron Judge is not in it.

Royals 5, Reds 2 — The Pasquatch — Vinnie Pasquantino — homered, and that’s all you really need to know to be a little bit happier.

Braves 7, Blue Jays 3 — Just another Braves win … but wait a minute, who is this Holmes guy that pitched for Atlanta? It’s not Clay Holmes, right — he’s still on the Mets, isn’t he? Who is Holmes?

Oh. It’s this guy. Grant Holmes.

I have no further questions.

Giants 1, Brewers 0 — I see the teams and the score and immediately think: Ben Sheets vs. Jason Schmidt, right? This old brain never stops being old. It was actually Logan Webb vs. one of all-time favorite name conundrums, Robert Gasser, a crafty lefty who, in fact, does not throw gas at all. Webb gave up one hit in seven innings. Gasser struck out five in five innings.

Cardinals 5, Rangers 3 — The Cardinals’ lineup is filled with last names that I immediately associate with players from the past.

1. Winn — Randy?

2. Herrera — Kelvin, the old Royals reliever?

3. Walker — Christian? Larry? Todd?

4. Velázquez — Gil? Freddie?

5. Burleson — Rick? How about Nate?

6. Fermin — Félix?

7. Gorman — Tom? Or how about Thomas?

8. Saggese — OK, no names come to mind.

9. Scott — Mike?

Maybe I’ve been watching baseball too long.

Athletics 5, Cubs 4 — Boy, this Cubs team baffles me. I felt kind of sure they were good. But even Nick Offerman throwing out the first pitch can’t save them. There were FIFTEEN pitchers used in this game. That seems like entirely too many pitchers.

Astros 11, Pirates 9 — I would always get so excited when seeing a high score like this because that meant there would be some offensive numbers to celebrate. I immediately go to see just how good a day Yordan had, and he didn’t disappoint — 4-for-5, a run scored, two RBI. He didn’t homer, but you can’t have everything. I see Oneil Cruz stole his 20th base!

Angels 11, Rockies 4 — I care about one thing and one thing only when I see this boxscore: How did Mike Trout do? There are 11 runs to be parsed out, let’s go! And … Trout went 0-for-3 with a walk and a run score. Yuck.

Dodgers 7, Diamondbacks 0 — Shohei Ohtani reached base five times as a hitter, and he allowed three base runners as a pitcher, and it’s just another impossible thing to add to his pile of impossible things. Mike is right: No matter how much we talk about Shohei, we never quite talk about him enough. Ohtani’s ERA, by the way, is 0.74, and he’s also now hitting .300/.400/.500 and leading the league in on-base percentage, and crazily this just might end up being his greatest season, which isn’t so great for an author who is putting the finishing touches on a book called FIFTY SEASONS, which comes out in February and is a countdown of the most magical seasons in baseball history.