I don't think this works, despite the seeming brilliance of the idea. For example, if there are two minus teams, I rarely feel happier if one wins - I just don't care period. Maybe the scale needs to be tightened up, even if some teams share a score - +5 to -5, or something like that, with maybe a 2 point adder (or subtractor) for a top favorite (or the Cowboys on the low end - goes without saying). And anything under a 5 point spread isn't even worth getting too invested in, or even believing.
For example, I really don't care when the Cowboys play the Patriots - just looking for a 0-0 tie and sadness everywhere! Or, for non-Seahawks games, I just enjoy watching if it's Chiefs/Chargers and would be happy for either fan base. Or when Vikings play Colts, I really don't care. Trying to capture all that in your system means it needs some tweaking.
Though I grew up in Washington DC (suburbs), and I was a fan of the local team, a few years ago I was taken to an Eagles-Giants game. No, I don't really know why.
I was clear from the beginning that I was rooting for injuries and penalties.
Now, I have given up the team of my youth. I hated the losing and the bad tackling and the owner's interference. But what actually drove me away was their signing of domestic abusers. Talent was available, and I understand that. But there must be limits. So, I do not root for them. Now that they've become part of The Handmaid's Tale, that decision is even easier to live with.
Nonetheless, my antipathy for the old divisions rivals remains. Yes, the Cowboys are still the worst. The Giants are still horrible, to me. And the Eagles, too, are horrible. The Cardinals were never a threat, so it is easy accept them. But they are generally in the "IDon'tCare" range.
So glad you're going to watch the Bears in person. Please do me a favor, though, and don't hold the stadium against your ultimate decision on whether to pick them as your team or not. Too bad you can't watch them in the new Arlington Heights stadium. Maybe you can reconsider in three or four years once it's built.
As someone who has lived in the Chicago area for his entire 55 year life, I cannot understand why anyone would decide to root for the Bears by choice.
With the exception of one year they will never forget to remind you of, this is a poorly managed organization that does little but take advantage of their highly motivated fanbase by consistently delivering underperforming, boring football.
I know Burrow and Chase are fun and the playoffs last year were fun and they could/should have won the Super Bowl, but seriously, you don’t want to be a Bengals fan
As a longtime Chicagoan who hates the Bears (I didn’t grow up here - so shoot me, Bears fans!), I’d be disappointed in your judgment if they became your team of choice. The McCaskeys, who own the team, are not the worst owners in football (not being the worst is a low bar), but they are not particularly likable, and they run the team literally like a mom and pop operation, which helps explain why they have won only one Super Bowl, in 1986, and have only been in another one since (in 2007). They conned the city into subsidizing the upgrade of Soldier Field which consisted effectively of dropping a giant bathtub into a classical style landmark structure rather than accepting a site more accessible to highways and public transportation; as it is, South Lake Shore Drive becomes impassible in either direction before and after games, with no viable alternatives for those of us who live near the lake. And now they are planning to ditch the city, at least if they can pull off a further con job on the taxpayers of Arlington Heights. I hope you and your daughter have a wonderful time in our fair city, but please don’t become Bears fans!
I think this specifically breaks down when your ranks mean two sub -10 teams compete.
I call it the, "Why can't an asteroid hit the stadium," threshold. Where you look at the matchup and start fantasizing about leaking gas mains or nuclear accidents. Say, if there's another Mets/Yankees World Series.
Oh my god. The curse of Big Papi! It explains so much. And not just for the Twins. It’s kind of forgotten now, but he started as “David Arias” in the Mariners farm system. There was an exhibition between the Mariners and the Timber Rattlers (where Ortiz was rostered) in 96 that was rained out. So it turned into a home run derby that Ortiz crushed. (This is discussed in Jon Boise’s “Mariners build a Death Star” video.). Mariners players are like “that guy needs to be called up immediately.” Mariners management decides differently and trades him to Minnesota as PTBNL for Dave Hollins trade. Remember how Mariners beat Yankees in ALDS in 95? Now they’re cursed. Longest postseason drought in MLB. Ortiz curse on Twins at least allows them to go to playoffs.
The “rank them all on a continuous scale” reduced the accuracy. If you hate the Cowboys infinitely more that other teams, shouldn’t there be more than 1 point between them and the next worst team? Are there really a bunch of teams in the “don’t really care” zone near zero?
I also want to echo the sentiment that a move from Browns fandom to Lions fandom is a lateral move. You deserve better. We Lions fans may not have “the drive” or “the fumble” but if there is a new and creative way to lose a football game, the Lions will find it. (See: running out of the back of your own end zone for a safety)
Joe, don’t keep us in suspense: How far down does this rabbit hole go? What were last year’s happiest and saddest picks? Which haters had the best of it over the past decade?
I do agree with the others that your system needs work, and I’m looking forward to version 2.
Speaking in general, if the Giants go 2-15, and their 2 wins are against the Cowboys, that's all I need to hear. That's the whole cake. If those 2 Giants wins kept the Cowboys out of the playoffs, that's the icing. I have rooted against the Giants if a Giants loss to the Eagles would keep the Cowboys out of the playoffs.
Of course, you need some GB, Pitt and Jets losses in there, too. But you've got the foundation there.
Of course, it is always important for the Yankees to lose. Always.
(After the Patriots won their first Super Bowl, a big bunch of Boston fans went outside of Fenway Park -- in February, mind you -- and started chanting "Yankees Suck! Yankees Suck!" You've got to remember the important things. Always.)
Also, I don't understand how the Browns went all the way down to +1 for Joe. I know he is understandably upset over the Watson thing, but for me the Chiefs could have Watson as their QB, Dan Snyder as their owner, have as much of a cheating history as the Broncos or Patriots, and be as bad the last decade as the Jets, and they still wouldn't drop that far.
I don't think this works, despite the seeming brilliance of the idea. For example, if there are two minus teams, I rarely feel happier if one wins - I just don't care period. Maybe the scale needs to be tightened up, even if some teams share a score - +5 to -5, or something like that, with maybe a 2 point adder (or subtractor) for a top favorite (or the Cowboys on the low end - goes without saying). And anything under a 5 point spread isn't even worth getting too invested in, or even believing.
For example, I really don't care when the Cowboys play the Patriots - just looking for a 0-0 tie and sadness everywhere! Or, for non-Seahawks games, I just enjoy watching if it's Chiefs/Chargers and would be happy for either fan base. Or when Vikings play Colts, I really don't care. Trying to capture all that in your system means it needs some tweaking.
Though I grew up in Washington DC (suburbs), and I was a fan of the local team, a few years ago I was taken to an Eagles-Giants game. No, I don't really know why.
I was clear from the beginning that I was rooting for injuries and penalties.
Now, I have given up the team of my youth. I hated the losing and the bad tackling and the owner's interference. But what actually drove me away was their signing of domestic abusers. Talent was available, and I understand that. But there must be limits. So, I do not root for them. Now that they've become part of The Handmaid's Tale, that decision is even easier to live with.
Nonetheless, my antipathy for the old divisions rivals remains. Yes, the Cowboys are still the worst. The Giants are still horrible, to me. And the Eagles, too, are horrible. The Cardinals were never a threat, so it is easy accept them. But they are generally in the "IDon'tCare" range.
So glad you're going to watch the Bears in person. Please do me a favor, though, and don't hold the stadium against your ultimate decision on whether to pick them as your team or not. Too bad you can't watch them in the new Arlington Heights stadium. Maybe you can reconsider in three or four years once it's built.
As someone who has lived in the Chicago area for his entire 55 year life, I cannot understand why anyone would decide to root for the Bears by choice.
With the exception of one year they will never forget to remind you of, this is a poorly managed organization that does little but take advantage of their highly motivated fanbase by consistently delivering underperforming, boring football.
Though it has been a very long time, I have lot of goodwill in my heart for Walter Payton.
Now, that's not enough to root for the Bears. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying there's an ember there.
Plus, it's ok to value defense.
I know Burrow and Chase are fun and the playoffs last year were fun and they could/should have won the Super Bowl, but seriously, you don’t want to be a Bengals fan
As a longtime Chicagoan who hates the Bears (I didn’t grow up here - so shoot me, Bears fans!), I’d be disappointed in your judgment if they became your team of choice. The McCaskeys, who own the team, are not the worst owners in football (not being the worst is a low bar), but they are not particularly likable, and they run the team literally like a mom and pop operation, which helps explain why they have won only one Super Bowl, in 1986, and have only been in another one since (in 2007). They conned the city into subsidizing the upgrade of Soldier Field which consisted effectively of dropping a giant bathtub into a classical style landmark structure rather than accepting a site more accessible to highways and public transportation; as it is, South Lake Shore Drive becomes impassible in either direction before and after games, with no viable alternatives for those of us who live near the lake. And now they are planning to ditch the city, at least if they can pull off a further con job on the taxpayers of Arlington Heights. I hope you and your daughter have a wonderful time in our fair city, but please don’t become Bears fans!
Yes, Jennifer Lawrence and the"SLP" featuring the Eagles does make them easily +11
Philadelphians boo'd Santa and threw batteries at players.
The Body Bag game.
Their always ugly ass uniforms.
What's an odious team.
I think this specifically breaks down when your ranks mean two sub -10 teams compete.
I call it the, "Why can't an asteroid hit the stadium," threshold. Where you look at the matchup and start fantasizing about leaking gas mains or nuclear accidents. Say, if there's another Mets/Yankees World Series.
Oh my god. The curse of Big Papi! It explains so much. And not just for the Twins. It’s kind of forgotten now, but he started as “David Arias” in the Mariners farm system. There was an exhibition between the Mariners and the Timber Rattlers (where Ortiz was rostered) in 96 that was rained out. So it turned into a home run derby that Ortiz crushed. (This is discussed in Jon Boise’s “Mariners build a Death Star” video.). Mariners players are like “that guy needs to be called up immediately.” Mariners management decides differently and trades him to Minnesota as PTBNL for Dave Hollins trade. Remember how Mariners beat Yankees in ALDS in 95? Now they’re cursed. Longest postseason drought in MLB. Ortiz curse on Twins at least allows them to go to playoffs.
I am so sorry but what article are you commenting on good sir?
I'm responding to something Joe and Mike were talking about on the PosCast before they got to the football happiness scale
The “rank them all on a continuous scale” reduced the accuracy. If you hate the Cowboys infinitely more that other teams, shouldn’t there be more than 1 point between them and the next worst team? Are there really a bunch of teams in the “don’t really care” zone near zero?
Oh, I hate the Cowboys infinitely. And that will never ever change. That's what infinitely does for me, there.
Cowboys-Giants or Cowboys-Packers? If the Cowboys lose, that's not always gonna cheer me that much. I hate a bunch of other teams A LOT.
So, that infiniteness is really quite a bit about the robustness of my hate, not just it's degree.
If the Chiefs are +16, isn’t Joe admitting that they’re his team?
He has said that this stuff is flexible. That's where he is today. But is looking for a more permanent home.
He also hates the Raiders and Broncos already, so makes a pretty solid fit.
I also want to echo the sentiment that a move from Browns fandom to Lions fandom is a lateral move. You deserve better. We Lions fans may not have “the drive” or “the fumble” but if there is a new and creative way to lose a football game, the Lions will find it. (See: running out of the back of your own end zone for a safety)
Indeed, trade your QB for a Super Bowl winner and watch the ex win a SB
Joe, don’t keep us in suspense: How far down does this rabbit hole go? What were last year’s happiest and saddest picks? Which haters had the best of it over the past decade?
I do agree with the others that your system needs work, and I’m looking forward to version 2.
Speaking in general, if the Giants go 2-15, and their 2 wins are against the Cowboys, that's all I need to hear. That's the whole cake. If those 2 Giants wins kept the Cowboys out of the playoffs, that's the icing. I have rooted against the Giants if a Giants loss to the Eagles would keep the Cowboys out of the playoffs.
Oh, yeah. I feel seen.
Of course, you need some GB, Pitt and Jets losses in there, too. But you've got the foundation there.
Of course, it is always important for the Yankees to lose. Always.
(After the Patriots won their first Super Bowl, a big bunch of Boston fans went outside of Fenway Park -- in February, mind you -- and started chanting "Yankees Suck! Yankees Suck!" You've got to remember the important things. Always.)
Chiefs vs. Broncos is my +32 game, and the Chiefs have now beaten them 13 consecutive times. That is a lot of happiness.
Also, I don't understand how the Browns went all the way down to +1 for Joe. I know he is understandably upset over the Watson thing, but for me the Chiefs could have Watson as their QB, Dan Snyder as their owner, have as much of a cheating history as the Broncos or Patriots, and be as bad the last decade as the Jets, and they still wouldn't drop that far.
For some of us, the Browns went from +16 to -16. Well, -13. The Cowboys, Steelers, and Patriots still exist.
I used ESPN's Football Power Index to calculate the expected values, i.e. their expected happiness
On Sunday both will be a bit unhappy, but Mike will feel worse: Mike (-2.652), Joe (-2.451)
But things should turn around on Monday, especially for Mike: Mike (+9.995), Joe (+9.832)